Aaron (AKB): That will have to go before the family board for approval.
Dylan (DWB): SHOE!
AKB: Good point. Psst. Dylan. This board member is open to bribery.
KWE: I guess we should have bylaws if we're going to have a board and meetings and stuff.
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Bleisenbylaws
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Bleisenbylaws
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1 If we buy a four (4) pack of delicious cupcakes from Wegmans in the evening, each adult gets one cupcake for dessert. The remaining cupcakes shall be reserved for breakfast.
1.1 If the four (4) pack is purchased on a morning, such as a weekend (ie Sat. and/or Sun.), all bets are off.
2 "Fatty" is to be used as a term of endearment. But not in public.
3 You do not talk about Bylaws.
4 Either one (1) or two (2) Bear Bears shall be acceptable at Bedtime.
4.1 Bedtime is to occur daily without fail at 7pm EST.
4.1.1 Bedtime will remain in effect for no less than eleven (11) hours, and twelve (12) would be better. NB: this does not apply to AKB.
4.1.2 No waking up before the first bell
5 When a hug or kiss is requested, NO! and a rapid escape are not an acceptable response. NB: this does not apply to AKB.
6 Snuffy shall be fed prescription Duck and Potatoes due to a Sensitive Digestive Tract.
7 And he'll like it.
8 English, Woof, and Dylish shall be established as the Official Languages. All signage must be posted in at least two (2) out of three (3) official languages.
9 SHOE! SHOE! SHOE!
10 NO BARKING. NB: this does not apply to AKB.
11 Statistics shall not be discussed at the dinner table.
11.1 Medical school and all associated topics shall not be discussed in front of AKB.
12 Literal, but obviously incorrect, interpretations of questions/comments will be dealt with harshly. "Obviousness" will be established by the family arbitrator, ie Bleisenblog.
13 When one (1) is clearly addressing DWB, it shall not be considered amusing for those other than DWB to answer as though the speaker had been speaking to him.
14 One (1) will make it clearer to whom she is speaking.
14.1 What, exactly, was unclear about "Should we change your diaper?"
14.2 LALALALALALA
15 No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.
16 At any given time, Snuffy shall be entitled to stretch himself across two-thirds (2/3) of the Bed or the Subaru.
17 Bleisenblog shall be established as the forum for public debate on all measures heretofore brought for Board consideration.
Thus ends the bylaws. Meeting dismissed.
7 comments:
I propose a hostile takeover of the company with these bylaws.
When Aaron was young he became incensed when his Dad & I discussed medical matters at the dinner table. Always thought it was interesting that he married a physician & clearly those kinds of discussions would continue in his adult life.
Anon - Yes, come take over. You will be in charge of getting Snuffy adequate exercise each day and keeping Dylan fed and clothed.
Nana - it's not the medical discussions that get to him, it's the medical SCHOOL discussions.
Snuffy has requested counsel to challenge his exclusion from the Board of Directors.
Snuffy has been assigned counsel by the court: The Distinguished And Honorable Bear Bear.
i'm impressed you guys actually eat at the dinner table!
Well, we eat there maybe once a week. I meant it as more of a metaphorical dinner table. It's usually covered in mail and notices from daycare.
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